In Praise of . . . the British Legal System

Those that think the proceedings of the British legal system are all about grown men wearing funny clothes and wigs were proven terribly wrong yesterday. In a hastily arranged hearing to dismiss the temporary restraining order preventing the sale of Liverpool Football Club, placed on it by the Dallas District Court by its American owners following a decision on Wednesday by the High Court in London, the full force of the British legal system was brought to bear.

The proceedings started slowly with Richard Snowden QC, acting on behalf of RBS. "The Texas court appears to have been told remarkably little about yesterday's verdict. This is the most outrageous abuse of process."

Oh Richard, you’re good but you’ve got a lot to learn. Make way for the real star of the show, Lord Grabiner QC (described by Chambers and Partners as “startling talented … an incomparable lawyer of undeniable star presence”).

Grabbo, as he is destined to be known by the KOP, tore into the American owners with the sort of panache not seen on these shores since David Niven passed away.

There was irony: "They want second bite of cherry and if it wasn't so serious, it would be a joke" he started.

There was sarcasm when describing the Dallas court as: “that world famous jurisdiction."

There was anger: “It is a grotesque parody, preposterous, unfair, unjust. They are incorrigible."

Wait, there’s more: “Abusive, vexatious, and oppressive ... a grotesque parody of the truth.'

It was left to Mr Justice Floyd however to apply the coup de grace. In words which are destined to adorn a banner on the KOP this weekend for the Merseyside Derby, he declared, with the air of a man who has not undergone the finest legal training in the world only to be frustrated by colonials, “This case has nothing to do with Texas."

Well said Sir!.